The most important affirmation
Even if you don’t have a daily affirmation practice, I recommend saying just one affirmation to yourself every opportunity you have.
I’m relatively new to reading self-help books. I don’t do it as often as I probably should because when it comes to reading, I tend to prioritize YA and fantasy books. Kinda nerdy, I know.
So, if you’re like me and don’t have a ton of time to invest in reading a self-help book, I’ll give a quick synopsis of one of my favorites for you. It’s called You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay and has been a book I continually refer back to since my mom gifted it to me several years ago. I’m an aspiring holistic healer, so this is kind of like my bible. In this book, Hay reveals to readers the immense power that lies within each of us to improve our lives and heal from illnesses, both physical and mental. Along with the power of holistic healing remedies, the main healing agent she discusses is positive affirmations.
“The thoughts we think and the words we speak create our experiences.” -Louise Hay
The above quote is her fundamental message. Our existence is in our control; we create our own unique realities. We have the power, through setting intentions and affirming our beliefs to change the course of our lives. So often people get trapped believing the world is against them, that there’s no changing the shitty place they’re in. This is a lie we tell ourselves. We always have the power to improve our situations, if we’re willing to commit to first changing ourselves and our thinking habits.
I have a daily affirmation practice. I have sticky notes with my six most valued affirmations posted on my mirror so I can be reminded to say them when I wake up, and every time throughout my day when I’m back in front of my mirror. I also have my longer, more specific affirmations written in the back of my journal, and I read over them and speak them aloud whenever I journal.
Affirmations are simply the thoughts/beliefs we think or say to ourselves that become our narrative. So often, our affirmations tend to be negative. I read an article on Medium that informed me that research has found on average roughly 80% of our self-talk is negative. That’s an insanely high amount. For some reason, our brains are out to constantly be the harsh critics; always trying to make us believe we aren’t good enough.
We constantly judge ourselves and form our lives around these beliefs we created about our realities. If we continually tell ourselves, “I’m not good at math,” we will affirm that belief and continue to not be good at math. But, just as we created the belief, we can also be rid of it too. We shape our experiences. We have the power to change any thought pattern, if it’s something we are willing to put in some dedicated work for.
Louise Hay gives examples of many different circumstances we can get ourselves into if we believe negative affirmations. We get into a slump and start to doubt our self-worth. Over time we can become more susceptible to illnesses, both mental and physical, because of their overbearing presence. It’s bound to happen, she teaches. The brain’s default chatter is negative. That’s why Hay’s first, and I argue most important, affirmation is:
“I accept and approve of myself.”
Simple, yet profound.
Positive affirming is the key to bringing about positive change. In order to do so, Hay teaches that we have to become more aware of our self-talk, and when it turns negative, actively try to replace it by repeating the above affirmation to ourselves. If we believe it, we become it. Start by telling yourself that you approve of yourself; every part of yourself. Accept who you are, even the more “quirky” parts. When you learn to accept those parts, then and only then can you work on improving them.
We are human beings; imperfect human beings with crazy thoughts and minds that can be difficult to control. We get stuck on believing thoughts that cause and prolong pain. We all have them, it’s okay. Positive affirming isn’t about getting rid of these thoughts completely, it’s about learning to redirect your thinking into something more beneficial for your health and wellbeing when they attempt to surface.
A lot of the time people don’t recognize how bad their inner voices are, and tend to blame the rest of the world for their unhappiness. Having the courage to recognize something inside of you is not aligning with your pure being, and then having the intent to improve it is all you need to get started. Find that voice inside you that tries to tell you that you aren’t pretty enough, or smart enough, or successful enough and affirm it gone. Whenever you feel the negative self-talk start to creep into your conscious mind, distracting you from being your best self, take a break from whatever you’re doing, take a deep breath, and repeat either silently or aloud, “I accept and approve of myself.” Say it as many times as you need to where you start replacing those previous negative thoughts with this positive one.
And there you have it: Louise Hay’s most important message (in my opinion), in just a few minutes. And now for mine: give yourself the tools to be as content as you possibly can. You are always worthy of acceptance and approval from yourself, so be your own biggest advocate. Start today.
